उज्यालो कि अन्धकार ?

पृथ्वी गोलो छ,
एकै समयमा
कतै उज्यालो झलमल
त कतै अन्धकार, अलमल ।

उज्यालो खोजे आशा छ ।
अध्यारो खोजे चुनौतीको पहाड छ ।
तिमी नै रोज,
तिमी के लिन्छौ ?

पारीबाट रङिन देखिने द्रिश्य
वारी अैपुग्दा रङहिन देखिन सक्छ ।
तिमीले देखेको त्यो स्वरुप
तिम्रै आँखा अगाडि कायापलट हुन सक्छ ।

शायद, त्यसैले उल्टिने गर्छन्
निर्णयहरु ।
कहिले बिना कारण
कहिले बेजोड तर्क सहीत ।

बिशेष पद

कार्यालयमा लामो समय काम गरेका चालक निल्कन्ठ आफुलाई कार्यालयको सबै भन्दा 'बिशेष' कर्मचारी मान्थे । एक हिसाबले बिशेष थिए पनि । हाकिम, यहाँ सम्मकी हाकिमका सारा शाखा सन्तान रिझाउन भ्याउथे । कार्यालयको कामको शिलशिलामा हाकिमलाई सबै कर्मचारीको कुरा (धेरै जसो नकरात्मक) पुर्याउने र हाकिमको प्रतिकृयामा मरमसाला थपेर कर्मचारीलाई भन्नुमा उनी निपुण नै थिए । हाकिमको अगाडि सार्है 'असल' र अरु कर्मचारीको अगाडि 'हाकिमहरुको काममा अत्यन्तै ब्यस्त' देखिन तल्लिन रहन्थे ।

जागिर बाहेक उनको ब्यक्तिगत 'ब्यापारिक' जिबन पनि फलिफाप भएकै थियो । छोराछोरी राम्रो गरी पढेका थिए, केहीले त रार्मो जागिर समेत् गर्थे । श्रीमतीले घर बसेर ब्यापार गर्थिन, उनी घर नबसेर । कार्यालयका कतिपय काममा पनि 'ब्यापारिक नाफा नोक्सान' मा अांकलन गर्न सिपालु थिए । उनी आफ्नो पदको नाम 'चालक' प्रती हेयभाब राख्थे । आफु जस्तै आफ्नो पद्को नाम पनि बिशेष हुनुपर्ने रायको साथै माग थियो उनको । आँफै टिकाटिप्पणी गर्थे ।

यसै शिल्शिलामा,  कार्यलय भरिमा नै सोझा मध्यमा पर्ने आफ्नो तत्कालिन सुपरिबेक्षकसामु 'लामो समय बिशेष योगदान सहितको काम गरेकोले पदको नाममा फेरबदल होस्' भनी निबेदन दिएका थिए । सुपरिबेक्षकले 'हुन्छ' को भाबमा टाउको हल्लाइदिये । अनी त के थियो र? समकक्षीलाई समाचार उद्घोश गरे उनले,  'संस्थाले आफ्नो लामो योगदानको कदर गर्दै आफ्नो पद्को नाम बदल्दैछ' । कार्यालयका साथीले अगाडि बधाई दिन्थे र पछाडि भन्थे 'बोल्नेको पिठो बिक्छ, नबोल्नेको चामल बिक्दैन' भनेको यस्तै हो ।

केही दिन पछी सुपरिबेक्षकले बोलाँउदा हात माड्दै पुगे उनी ।

बिना भूमिका नै, हात तेर्साये सुपरिबेक्षकले, 'ल दाई बधाई छ यहाँलाई । हजुरको लामो सेवा र संस्थाप्रतिको योगदानलाई कदर गर्दै अाजदेखी यहाँको पद को नाम फेरिएर 'बरिस्ठ चालक' बनाइएको छ । बोल्नको लागि उनिसँग शब्द थिएन, र थिएन सुपरिबेक्षकको कब्जामा रहेको आफ्नो 'मिलायेको हात' तान्ने सामर्थ्य पनि । 

सजिब सपनाहरु

मेरा पनि छन्
केही सजिब सपनाहरु ।

तर पनि, छ डर,
बाढिले बगाउला कि?
पहिरोले खसाउला कि?
हुरिले उडाउला कि?
कसैले उखेलिदेला कि?

अहँँ, कदापी दिनेछैन म
मेरा सपनालाई, बस्तु झै मोल मोलाई
अनी नापतौल गर्नलाई
दिनेछैन म, सपनाको आहुती ।

मेरा सपना नै बन्ने छन्
मेरो लागि शक्ति ।  
मेरा सपना नै बनीरहनेछन्
मेरो लागि शक्ति ।  

Opportunities

Few Years Ago.

BA First Year

First day of class. (I was there on third day only. It was quite different experience to go to public college. It was like maze for me. I was not sure about the roads, the buildings and classes. As it was first day I had allocated around 25 minutes margin before the classes started. It took me full 20 minutes to locate my class. I was completely exhausted by the time I was able to find my class.)

First period was just over. Suddenly everyone started moving out like crowds. Everyone was rushing as if there was disaster. I could not locate, what went wrong? Though, I did not leave my seat, I was like pushed by the students who were jumping out of their desks. I learnt later that they were actually rushing to get seat in next classes for next period so that they can learn with better lecturers. That sounds funny. I continued to continue in same space and learn at same class; hmm I was better with good lecturers as I hesitated to rush. I noticed that there were more boys in class than girls.

BA Second Year 

By the time our classes of second year were concluding, I realized boys were disappearing. (Don't worry, it's not magic, they were either queuing up for taking foreign study consultancy services, joined Korean Language classes, trying to find reliable Manpower (they still call it manpower) and had dropped due to some other reasons. 

BA Third Year 

Classes were running faster than ever before. And tuition classes were on full swing. Finding more students in tuition centers than in college was not a surprise. Be that at regular classes or tuition classes, I felt there were more girls in the classes. 

---------------

I finished bachelor course. Life continued moving, I enrolled into Masters. One day, we were attentively listening lectures from our Lecturer on 'Feminism'.

He stated, 'I think we are doing better. On Masters Classes, there are less boys and more girls, not just girls but lot of married women as well. So, people are no more hesitating to send girls to school/college, in fact they are sending their daughter in laws to College. Well, this is amazing."

Why should anyone stop just being married? Why Masters classes can't have more girls?

I tried to understand what notion did his statements carried in depth. Somehow I realized our lecturer's connotation was in positive tone. He was not complaining on the presence of more girl students, but was happy that more women have access to higher studies. He left in a while. I felt quite happy; in fact I felt like celebrating girl's power and treat ourselves as we could made up-to Masters. I took a while to have a look at time. As I noticed last class had went on for extra 10 minutes. I waved my friends on my bench and rushed to catch bus so that i could reach office in time.

Soon, I was busy settling lot of papers at my desk and mails at my inbox. By afternoon, I was trying to prepare a cup of Coffee Office lobby. I could hear two of my colleagues (Bhim and Arogya) giggling out loud. Till the time I had creamy Coffee ready, I was quite upset to overhear the conversation.

My ethics told me not to join the colleagues' conversation, whereas my inner heart suggested me that I need to intrude in between these gossips. I decided to join. Arogya was continuing to listen remaining in his revolving chair and was bit careful and his wide giggling face somehow compressed when I joined them with a cup in my hand. He opened his specs and wiped it with the pink fabric. Bhim was standing and speaking while leaning on working table.

Bhim tried to conclude, 'So, this is the reason that we should have no womens. No additional women staffs on our section for the time being'.

I tried to remain at ease and asked politely, 'May I know the reason why women staff should be strictly not recruited in your section? Ah.. Let me correct, our section.

We are in same section right, Admin and Finance?'

'I am fine with women staffs working in Admin. But for Finance, no way.'

'Can you elaborate this further, Bhim Sir?'

'See Sima Miss, we have to work after office hour as well. We need to rush to banks and tax offices. We may need to work till late evening; we may need to work on weekend and holidays as well?

'Oh, I see. Are these all reasons sufficient or you have more?'

'Ah.. Women staffs can't work like donkeys as male staffs do?'

'Are you going to recruit donkeys to carry loads or human resources?'

'Of course, we are hiring human resources'.

I responded, 'Well, I am aware that nature of our work demands extra hour works often and out of office movement as well. But women staff can easily do all these if we provided enough support. We just need to be cooperative'.

'I am not here to cooperate with women staffs. Simply, they will work less than me and I will have additional jobs. I will not simply allow my boss to recruit women staffs.'

I was feeling quite uncomfortable by then. Yet I did not give up. 'Do you think some of my assignments has been incomplete just because I am Woman'?

'No'.

'Do you think my quality of work have been degraded because I am Woman'?

'No'.

'Do you think the performance at my current position would have been better had there been man doing this job'?

'No'.

'Why it is so?'

'You are doing good job. I think good enough. I think you are doing exemplary work.'

'Then why have you problems if we hire women staff in our section?'

'Because women can't work as men do in Office'?

Gosh.. I was annoyed by his statements. Yet, ensuring enabling work environment was one of my primary task. So I could not let him go with his 'Anti women thinking for his section'.

'You have been working with Ms. Neelam for couple of years, do you have any instance she could not complete her work because she was woman'.

'No, never. In fact there is no single room of defect in her work. She can easily handle multiple tasks. In some situations, while dealing with service providers, though I am not dealing with them directly, I am quite irritated. I feel like slapping service providers for all stupid demands. But she handles them with much comfort.'

'Do you feel you could have done job better had you been doing the functions/roles which Ms. Neelam is doing right now.'

'No. She is more than perfect for her job. She is role-model'.

I now knew how I can convince him.

'See, you yourself are telling that women staff in our section is doing their jobs perfectly. No work has been hampered just because they are women.'

'But both staffs you referred are good ones including you.'

'If you have already two women staffs who are doing excellent jobs right at your section, you can't deny that upon hiring another women staff she could do even more excellent jobs. Please don't just negate on women's ability to work. Together we can create better work environment and work for achievement of organization's goal. We are working for gender equity and social inclusion in our Programmes. This is not achieved without having diverse workforce.'

His face was not as stiff and his eyes somehow told he was curious to listen. I realized somehow it's the best time to convince him.

I continued, 'Diverse staff means getting diverse ideas as well. Not only this, this is like having more innovations and learning from different culture as well. When we are diverse then we can better connect with our diverse impact groups. We always tell our impact groups on social justice and inclusion. They will believe and follow us if only we have diverse workforce. That's living up to what we say. Our work can be easily done by women staff, we should not have such biases, otherwise, we will never have enabling work environment'.

'Hmm. I think I know the notion why everyone else tells we should have diverse staffs. I just knew the real reason. I am happy to work from whichever background s/he comes.'

I took deep breathe. My eyes rested on my colleague sitting on chair who was gazing.

'Are you Ok?', I asked to Arogya.

He responded with wide smile.

'I feel like enlightened. I should thank him for questions and you for the responses. I am convinced fully and will convince whoever has questions on inclusion and diversity'.

I was happier than ever. I believed at least these two friends can now convince others as well.

We hired women staff in Finance Section. She is continuing to perform excellent job and all of her colleagues including Bhim are providing her ample cooperation.

------------

I have friend who have been teaching in same Private institutions for long time. Not only this, they have been teaching for same level throughout their service period. As I ask them on why it is so, they simply answer "being women, our School Management thinks we can't control students as Men do. I keep on arguing with them, yet, none of my friend attempted to convince School Management. Some of my friends have completed Masters Degree. They have rich knowledge yet they are limited to their primary level still from where their career started. At times, I feel I may be trying to tickle in their problems when I ask them if they were able to go beyond their assignments and stop myself from asking question.

------------

'Have you ever been denied from some opportunities just because you are women?

This was the question put forth by me to women applicants during job interview. Somehow I felt like restless to hear the response of interviewee. I somehow felt like while asking that particular question, I felt like nervous. Don't know if someone noticed me or not.

The responses were quite different. Some were never denied, some were often and some were denied for few times. Some were denied at home, some at school, some at college, and some at work-space. While some were denied to eat what they wanted, some were denied to dress on the way they intended, some were denied to have friends as they wished, some were denied to visit places they wanted, some were denied to study what they wanted, some were denied to work where they wanted, some were not offered job just because they were women.

Yet these are lucky girls who could at least make up-to here. Several should have dropped their wish and let it go. Some would have struggled and continued and some would have felt tired of struggling and just let go the things in the manner they go simply. The selection process was over, the results were amazing. The selected list had diverse, competent, committed and confident perspective staffs. We were happy to receive young professionals including women staff committed to do best in job with firm decision to work in some of most remote districts.

As the new staffs joined duty, we had brief introduction and welcome programme at Office Meeting Hall. After returning from welcome programme, I was working to finalize presentation for orientation for the recently hired colleagues, Bhim was there. As I asked him if he wanted any help from me.

He responded, 'You had briefed me on the importance of diverse work force. Seeing these young professionals and their commitments to work I am feeling delighted. I was like surprised to see on how they introduced themselves on such different and meaningful way. I feel it will be great to work with diverse people and learn from their experience and background.

I was more than happy to see complete transformation in him.  

Yes, more opportunities to work with diverse people and learn from diverse ideas. 

म, पुस्तक र कथा

जब जब थाकेर कोठामा आउँछु, मेरो स्वागतमा रहन्छन् चाङका चाङ पुस्तक । यिनै चाङका चाङ पुस्तकले त रोक्छन् मलाई कोठा सर्नलाई पनि । कति पटक यो पाली त जसरी र्सछु भनेर ठान्छु, फेरी पुस्तकका चाङले छेकीदिन्छन् बाटो । यो महिना अब केही किन्दीन भन्छु, अनि पुस्तक पसल अगाडी पुग्ने वित्तीकै चुम्बकसरी तानिन्छु म । अनि सोच्छु, हेरौँ न, अनि फेरी एउटा त लिउँ न, अनि फेरी अर्को हेर्दा यो त संग्रहणीय पुस्तक पो रहेछ भन्यो अनि थपिन्छन् चाङमा केहि थान पुस्तक । कसरी म कोर्सवाहिरका पुस्तकमा यतिसाह्रो आकर्षित भएँ भनेर म अचम्म पर्छु । पढाईमा मध्यमभन्दा माथि नै रहे पनि कोर्सका किताब मेरो प्राथमिकतामा कहिले परेनन् । वा भनौँ, कक्षा लिएकै भरमा नै पार गरेँ कति तह । कोर्स पढ्नमा धेरै समय नखर्चे पनि किताब जम्मा पार्न भने म अगाडी नै आउँथे । मेरा मिल्ने साथीहरु जाँचको अघिल्लो दिनमा पुस्तकपसल गएर “थोरै पानाको सबैभन्दा स्लीम पुस्तक” को माग गर्दा मसँग भने लगभग सबै प्रकाशनगृृहबाट प्रकाशित कोर्ससामाग्री स्रग्रहीत हुन्थेँ, पढ्ने बेला ति मध्ये सबै कोर्सका पुस्तकले पालो भने पाउँदैनथे । 

जुनसुकै उमेरसमुहका व्यक्तिलाई उपहार दिँदा पहिलो पटक मेरो दिमागमा पुस्तक आउँछ । अनि त्यो व्यक्तिको पुस्तक प्रतिको अभिरुची, आवश्यकता र महत्व जस्ता आधारमा लेखाजोखा गरेपछि पुस्तक नै उपहार दिने वा नदिने बल्ल र्निक्यौल गर्छु । पुस्तक उपहार दिन उचीत लागुन्जेल अरु कुनै चिजलाई उपहारको रुपमा मेरो मनले स्वीर्कादैन । पछिल्लो पटक मैले पनि धेरै साथिहरुबाट पुस्तक उपहार पाउने गरेको छु ।  “पढौँ र ज्ञान बाँडौँ” को नारासहित पठन संस्कृतिको विकासमा लागि परेको ¥यान्डम रिर्डससगँको आवद्धताले त झन पुस्तकमोहमा घिउमा आगो थपेको सरह भएको छ । मलाई थाहा छैन, मलाई सवैभन्दा पहिले उपहारमा पुस्तक कसले दिनुभयो ? पक्कै बुबा वा ममिले नै होला । त्यसो त मामाघर जाने भनेवित्तीकै चार वित्ता उफ्रीनु कुनै नौलो कुरा होइन । झनै मामाघरमा हुने कथाका कितावको कारणले म चार वित्ता भन्दा पनि माथि उफ्रिन्थेँ । मामाघर पुगेर सबै जनासगँ सामान्य सन्चोविसन्चोको औपचारीकता पुरा हुनवित्तीकै म मामाको पुस्तकै पुस्तकैले भरिएको कोठामा पुग्थे । गरिमा, मधुपर्क लगायतका साहित्यीक श्रृंखलाको अलावा मामाको पुस्तकको आलमारीमा कथाका पुस्तक प्रशस्त हुन्थे । त्यो बेलासम्म उपन्यासबारे भने म जानकार थिइँन । अनि निदाउनुअघि मामाले सुनाउने कथाको विशेष स्थान थियो । जब म घर फर्किनुपर्ने दिन आउँथ्यो, तब मलाई मामाका आलमारीका पुस्तकहरु देखेर माया लाग्थ्यो, अनि यतिका पुस्तकसँग म किन सँधै रहन नपाउने होला भनेर दुख पनि । म घर आइसके पनि मन भने मामाघरको आलमारीका पुस्तकमा नै हुन्थ्यो ।

स्कुल जाँदा बाटोमा पर्ने ढाकाराम ठुलोबाकोमा पसेर “मुना” पत्रिका आयो भनेर सोध्नु त मेरो दैनिकी नै थियो । उहाँलाई रिस उठेको बेलामा त भन्नुहुन्थ्यो, “मुना मासीक बाल पत्रिका हो, गोरखापत्र वा कान्तीपुर जस्तो दैनिक पत्रिका होइन ।” त्यो भन्दा पछि चैँ रिसले मुरमुरिँदै खै के गुनगुन गर्नुहुन्थ्यो मैले भेउ पाईन । छनछन बज्ने सिक्का र मयल र पसिनाको पुरा एक तह सहितका पुराना नोट सहित ६ रुपैँया जम्मा गरेको पैसाले मुना पत्रिका खरिद गर्दा म आफैँलाई भाग्यशाली मान्थे । घर पुगेर हस्याङ्गफस्याङ्ग गर्दै गृहकार्य गर्नमा तम्सिन्थे, यहाँसम्म कि खाजा खान सम्म वास्ता गर्दैनथे । कसैले केहि नभनी गृहकार्य गर्न तम्सेको देखेपछि ममिले पढ्ने सामाग्रीको जोहोको लख स्वत काट्नुहुन्थ्यो । उहाँले पनि कहिलेकाँही स्कुलबाट केहि पुस्तक ल्याईदिनुहुन्थ्यो, धेरै जसो कथाका किताब । अनि फोहोर नपार्ने, अरुलाई नबाँड्ने, नच्यात्ने, नकेर्ने लगायतका र्शतसहित । शर्तको सूचि लामो भए पनि मेरो पुस्तकमोहको सामु त्यो मेरोलागि पहाड जस्तो पनि थिएन । पछि छिमेकका दिदिहरु कलेज जान थालेपछि उहाँहरुको कोर्सका र कोर्सबाहिरका पुस्तक मगाएर पढ्थेँ, उहाँहरुको नियमको सूचि त झनै ममिको भन्दा लामो हुन्थ्यो, अनि भनेको समयमा फिर्ता नगरे जरिवाना शूल्क लाग्ने सहित गरेर । यो बेलामा मन, मुलकबाहिर, बसाइँ लगायतका पुस्तक पढेको थिएँ ।

कक्षा ८ मा थिएँ, विज्ञान पढाउने सर आउनुभएको थिएन, त्यसैले खालि थियो तेस्रो पिरियड । बिहान रेडियोमा सुनेको समाचार अत्यन्तै रोचक लागेको थियो, त्यसैले सुनाउँदैथिए म साथिहरुलाई कसरी तत्कालिन प्रतिपक्षि दलका नेता माधव कुमार नेपालले पेट्रोलियम पदार्थको मूल्यवृद्धिको विरोधमा प्रधानमन्त्रीलाई ज्ञापनपत्र वुझाउन साइकलमा सवार भएर गएको कुरा । मेरा साथिहरु निकै टक लगाएर सुन्दैथिएँ  । त्यतिकैमा मे रातोपिरो भएँ, प्राचार्य सर हातमा खिरिले लठ्ठी लिएर । पिटाई खाइनेमा हामी आश्वस्त नै थियौँ, साथैमा भनाई पनि । उहाँले पिटाईसगँै भन्नुभयो, “अहिलेलाई आफ्नै चिन्ता गरोैँ हजुर, देशको लागि प्रधानमन्त्री छन्, नाथे ८ कक्षाकोले किन देशको चिन्ता होला” । मुटुमा विझेको थियो सरको त्यो वाक्य । यो घटनाको करीब एक वर्ष पछाडि म कक्षा ९ मा हुँदा ताका ढाकाराम ठुलोबाकोमा हिमाल पाक्षिक पत्रिका आउँथ्यो । असोज १८को  लगत्तैको पत्रिका थियो, आवरणमा तत्कालिन राजा ज्ञानेन्द्रको तस्वीर भएको । समाचारमा भन्दा विश्लेषणमा मेरो रुचि बढ्न थालेको थियो अनि असोज १८ को भित्री कथा जान्ने उत्सुकताले किनेको थिएँ पत्रिका । त्रैमासिक परिक्षा चल्दै गरेकी छोरीको हातमा यस्तो पुस्तक देखेपछि बाबा रिसाउनुभएको थियो, हाललाई आफ्नै किताब तिर ध्यान दिम, अरुतिर ध्यान दिनलाई पुरै जिन्दगी छ । त्यती भनेर उहाँले हिमाल मेरो हातबाट लग्दा म भने मुर्तीजस्तै उभीएको थिएँ । एस.एल.सीको परिक्षा सकेर स्याङ्गजाको सदरमुकामबाट घर फर्कीदाँ मेरो कोठामा थिए केहि थान पुस्तक, पोखराबाट मगाईएका कोर्सका पुस्तक पो रहेछन्, त्यो पनि १०+२ का । आश्चर्यचकित मुद्रामा बुबालाई सोधेँ, “कसको हुन् यतिका नयाँ पुस्तक” । जवाफमा मेरा लागि रहेछ भनेर थाहा पाउँदा अचम्म मानेँ । अनि मलाई नसोधी कसले निर्णय ग¥यो मेरो पढाईको भनेर सोध्न मैले केही सेकेन्ड पनि कुरिन । विज्ञान लगायतमा खास रुची नराख्ने र अंग्रेजी राम्रै भएको लगायतका तथ्यलाई आधार मान्दै मेजर अंग्रेजीको निर्णय लिईएको सुनीरहँदा म भने कोर्समा नै साहित्य पढ्न पाइन्छ भनेर प्रफुल्लीत भाको थिएँ ।

http://canvassnap.blogspot.com/2013/05/book.html

स्नातक दोस्रो वर्षको परिक्षा सकेको रात म पढ्ने कुरा नभेटेर रातभरी निदाउन सकिन । परिक्षा हुनेबेलासम्म भने परिक्षा सक्नु पाए त मस्त निदाउँथे भन्ने थियो, तर परिक्षा सकेपछि पनि म निदाउन सकिन । विचित्र नै रहेच पढ्ने बानि पनि । जबजब म जोड्छु एउटा प्रसँगमा अर्को प्रसगँ,  साथीहरु भन्छन् “फेरी सुरु भयो तेरो कथा हैन, कति हो के कथा पनि, तेरो कथा सकिने दिन कस्तो होला” । मेरो कथा सकिने दिन त म कल्पना पनि गर्न सक्दिन । मेरो जिवनमा कथाको अनुपस्थिति भए म कति अधुृरो र रित्तो हुनेछु, सोच्दा पनि डर लाग्छ । कथाले जोडेको छ मलाई, मैले जोडेको छु कथा । मसगँ जिवित छन् कति कथा र कति कथाकै कारण जिवित छु म । मेरा सम्पुर्ण कथाको समाप्ती अर्थात सिंगो मेरो समाप्ती । 

Delighting Doti

You guys need to go 'Out of Cocoon'. Step out of the box and get some fresh air. You guys need to learn how things go at field. 

This is how our boss inspires us for field visits. Still I haven't been able to make remarkable field trips so far. I am always fond of travelling to new places. Yet, as works continue to pile up during travel days as well, I don't feel like travelling. 

So you need to go Doti.

.....

Doti, when?

Monday...

..but I have to finish so many works. I have already enough work piled up. I can't go right now...

You need to complete this, this and this and move Doti. Start preparation from right now.

Can't we postpone this for some time. 

No, that's the top priority for now. Finish your remaining works once you get back.

I was not quite happy. As my plan to complete pending works after finishing 'Annual Get together' thing was now like obsolete. As I had no option than going, I consulted team members and was with procedures and preparations. 

We left for Doti on 1st day of Nepali New year. We were already half and hour late than the time we had agreed upon. My friends were not quite happy with my decision to go field. I was leaving city when rest of the city was preparing for new year celebration. This is life. We moved ahead. 

We had brief snacks session at Ghashi Kuwa. The owner was once local motivator at our institution. This is how me including all staff felt connected and had snacks in his particular shop. We were talking of having food. Ganga Dai told he will make us eat at place where we get non veg Khana on just Rs. 100. 

We were surprised. In fact, I did not believe him. He made calls on that place and  placed orders. Vehicle stopped at Jugedi, small mud made house named 'Hotel Dhido'. Soon we were found very busy eating. 

My phone rang. Mom was on line with her regular queries. 

Who else is in team? Oh, you have good people around. It's good. Take good food, take rest and all. 

(Life would have been bliss if only people around us would care us as Mom does...)

.................

Hello. When will your Programme start?

Which programme? 

The one you invited me for. Picnic. No what you called, Annual Get together. 

No, it was one day before yesterday. Why are you asking now?

Ah.. I thought was for today. So, it's over already. 

It was over days ago actually. 

Ah...Sorry Dai, but why were you confused. Did not I tell you that it was on Saturday. 

I might have got it wrong. My mobile network had some problem, I got it was for today. 

Oh.. sorry. Anyway, Happy New Year Dai. 

Happy New Year to you as well. So Dai, what are your plans for today.

I don't have any plans, as I left today for your programme. 

Oh sorry. 

So where are you? 

I am now at Chitwan, for field trip to Doti. 

So who else are with you. 

Kamal Dai and Laxmi D..

May I talk to them.

Of course. 

(Phone was revolved around both of them and the same story continued with laughter this time)

Yes, bills proved the delicious Non Veg Khana was on Rs. 100 only. Ganga Dai was proud of the place in actual. I passed light.We are back in vehicle. We stop before ATM counter at Narayangadh as Laxmi D wanted to draw some amount. ATM system have made us very dependent and instant. Sometimes when we rely on ATM too much, this does counter attack due to system/machine malfunction and prolonged power-cut. Anyway, she was able to draw some money and we moved forward. Suddenly, the vehicle had some problem. It's not generic problem, it had something to do with the brakes. We were worried. Well, we were not worried only, we took at time to have some snaps as well.

Laxmi D posing for photo. [Background: Jhalak Dai and Ganga Dai are trying to trace what went wrong?]

Ganga Dai managed it in his River brave attitude in his own terms somehow. Then, we stopped by our Site Office in Kawasoti. Krishna Dai gave us warm welcome, well her daughter's smile was ever pleasing. We looked through all the rooms when Jhalak Dai and Ganga were busy uploading some machines for Ghanteswar Office, Doti. It was one of office which was recently expanded with additional human resources. It looked like there were some changes made which were on it's process of completion. We stopped in Gorusinghe, Ganga was with the mechanic to fix the problem, and we found a place for tea/coffee break.

Our vehicle had some problems when we were on road with dark forest. As the vehicle seemed to be bit problematic, our faces were shrinking with tensions. Ganga notified, it's ok again. Then we continued from there to Kohalpur. Mechi Mahakali Hotel was communicated in advance. We just dropped our luggage and jumped over dining tables. As two of us (Laxmi D and me) had been to west for the first time, we were supposed to provide 'Panthe'. Well, it was new year eve, and 'Panthe' was a good reason to celebrate both things. On another note, we could do that with small budget as no one was interested in liquors.  We scanned through a long list of items shown in menu, among  which french-fry and papads were the few items which could be served. We didn't took long for initial season, then turned in for dinner and went for a much deserved sound sleep. Next day began with alarms, rush, payments and tea sessions. We stopped at Attariya, Ganga was soon seen bargaining with fruit vendors. Soon, no one was talking. How could anyone talk, everyone had their mouth full of oranges.

There were check points in High way within area of national park. Those check points were administered by Nepal Army. Whenever they stopped, Ganga Dai was there with his small papers, half of A4 size paper. He signed the paper off and instant and forwarded to the security personnel with one smart smile. Till the time the security personnel would have read the paper we would have almost crossed at least 500 meter. Then, he told, 'See, this works like this'. He continued the same in all check points thereafter. Jhalak's phone was continuously ringing. He was talking very wise things and we were quite amused to hear him using local accents and dialects. Well, this is how you can work with local community better. Hmm, we were impressed. Ganga promised us that we would get chance for small break at Ghodaghodi and Karnali bridge while returning.

Then we saw Bhashu Pahad. Ganga was relating to me, this is even bigger than your Bhalu pahad, Baini.

'Well, that's not mine'.  

That's at Syangja, as you are from there, I told so. What's the difference?

Argument was not required. I responded with smile. 

Jhalak Dai was busy ordering food at Budhitola and ensuring the meal would be more than perfect. We were too hungry when we stopped there. There appeared the board, 'Hotel Waling Syangja'. 

What? I was like perplexed. Jhalak Dai told, yes, they are from Syangja, they were here since their ancestors moved here long ago. World is a small place. So, Nepal is even smaller, and people from Syangja are spread all over. Smart old man served us delicious food with lovely aroma.  He again came up with local ghee. As I said few drops for fragrance, 'Fine, you were brought up with care, so no worries'. I understood he was talking about extra bulges. I let it go.  

We stopped at Site office Gahira. Laxmi D was checking the ledger and finance stuffs. Whereas, Kamal Dai was asking on trials, seeds and all. I was trying to find details of assets. As soon as we finished our works, we moved for Silgadi. The roads were like whirls and swirls. At times, suddenly the bus and vehicle would be seen in front. They did not gave horn. The landscape was really beautiful. Red red rhododendron were all the way. We could see some white flowers, some light pink flowers. And there were several small small flowers which were very small yet large enough to attract the passer-bys. Ganga showed us 'so that's Deuba's village'. Not sure, whether he meant it or that was just for fun. Then we could see shining fields where light yellow wheat was sparkling as people were busy for harvesting preparation. Now, I could see some ladies with Bulakis and typical dress. Well, I had seen my grandmom wearing Bulaki long ago, but it was almost rare these days. We reached Dipayal, then the high hills of Silgadi started. Ganga told it's like Sarangkot. We reached Danfe. Well, thanks to Adhiraj Sir. He had made good arrangements for us. We got fresh. As we moved outside, we could see one person who later turned out to be the helpful Adhiraj Sir. We had some consultations and discussions followed by tea and snacks. We just climbed to the road that went up, up and up only. Soon, it was too difficult to move ahead. We stopped by a Chautari and again were stuck with work stuffs. As soon as we returned, we took our dinner and were there for final round discussions for tomorrows programme. 

As soon as we moved out of Hotel, Adhiraj Sir was ready there. We moved to two houses, both of them were not like upto the mark. In between, we went to Shaileswari temple. There were few kids asking for money. Adhiraj Sir was telling 'I had seen noone like such before, these boys should have been very new'. We understood his notion, he felt awkward that we could have bad impression of Doti. Well, it happens everywhere, and Doti is not an exception. We rushed for lunch as were were already late than the planned time. It was now my turn to receive calls. Was quite worried with the latest developments and revelations. We moved in to Adhiraj Sir's office and had several round of consultations and discussions. The programme went well. We again looked one house, which was in fact very nice but the budget was much more than very nice. 

Jhalak Dai had organized interaction programme with Biodiversity Conservation and Development Committee. We had planned to stay at Amargadhi so that we could reach Gahira early next day. Ganga contacted with Shining star hotel and we checked in there. The ladder looked scary, but the rooms were good enough. They had wifi as well, it was bonus for us as we had no connection for almost two days. Next morning, when we were getting ready, there was someone knocking our door. 

Your tea,.. Maam.

Well, this was something beyond expectation. Laxmi D was so happy. Hotel looks be kuch special. 

Hmm.. I agreed with her statement. 

Again, packing luggage, billings and all. Jhalak was on line telling one should not miss the opportunity of going Ugratara, otherwise Dadeldhura trip won't be complete. We were in rush, so continued with our plans. We dropped at Gahira. Some Biodiversity Conservation Development Committee (BCDC) members were already there. BCDC members chipped in the vehicle and we stopped by Dabdhi wheat trial fields.

Members are discussing within themselves before formal meeting starts. "So, let's decide. How are we going to put our concerns forward. We need to tell the challenges we are facing right now, right?"

 Kamal Dai was discussing with BCDC members on wheat traits and their trials. I found some amusing flowers and tried some macro  effects. 

There were two elderly ladies by the side of trial fields. I tried to talk with them and sought their permission for capturing their pictures. One of them replied me, Nani, what do you want to capture? We are so old, beauty has left us long ago. You want to take photos of us, our wrinkles? 

No, Aama, you look even more beautiful with your wrinkles. This is how your maturity is reflected. (Well, that was the only way to console her) 

She showed her hands and shared how difficult was her with her joint pain problems. I shared how my neighboring grandmother used to find ways for her living despite  her joint pains. 

We are with dimples, let's not worry about wrinkles. 

I followed Kamal Dai in wheat fields again. He was bit shy when I was clicking his pictures. 

Soon, Jhalak Dai started the programme. Female participants were quite clear on what they wanted. We were quite happy with their responses and expectations. 

This is how we are growing with the changes. Yes, we are changing. We are growing. [A lady is signing the minutes whereas another is busy with her mobile.]

As interaction continued, this sight was one of such which really inspired me. 

A lady sad on wooden planks as she did not find space for her. She was comfortable with that and confident enough to share what she felt. 

Interaction programme was shortly finished and we were seen doing final greetings. We went to the same place for lunch. Old man greeted with same sweet smile though the food served had not the aroma and sweet taste as before. Ganga Dai lived through his promise of stopping us by Ghodaghodi lake and Karnali bridge. We stayed at Mechimahakali itself, firstever destination we repeated in this trip. We moved early next day and stopped over at Bhalubang for snacks. Things were not that good, yet coffee after five full days tasted real good. We stopped at Daunne for lunch, served with Latte (Amaranthus), Dhido and local chicken, this lunch was declared as 'best lunch' of tour by our team. We reached Mugling where Bidhata D was eagerly waiting for her friend, Laxmi D. We had short chitchats, review of trips. Our roads diversed from there, one to Kathmandu (Laxmi D, Bidhata D and her spouse) and ours to Pokhara. 

We moved ahead. Kamal Dai was sharing on how it feels like staying in hostel, all the way from Gandaki Boarding School to IAAS Rampur and LI-BIRD Finally. 

The thrilling scene you find in Highways. "Why road safety is such a disaster?" This question always rules me whenever I am in highway.

Well, I enjoyed this trip a lot. Lot of discussions, sharings, exchange, interactions, fun, view and amusements. These kind of visits are much needed to give yourself a break for the sake of change. We can learn a lot from people you meet, places you stay, through the roads you pass by, you will be amused by the lovely view, scared by the thrills. All in all, what we get is enriching experience. In short, doti trip was delightful. I was delighted by Doti. :) :) :)